Thursday, August 23, 2012

Rock Center with Brian Williams

Did Brian Williams accurately portray, as they said, "What it means to be a Mormon in America?" That's open for debate. Aside from the rhetoric, there were just two facts that I felt were inaccurately or incorrectly portrayed, and I wanted to clear those up.

On Caffeine
"we're going to sell them cheap books and legal addictive stimulants." - Tom Hanks as Joe Fox in You've Got Mail

The Church doesn't have an official stance against caffeine! Faithful members do not partake of Coffee, Tea (Herbal is ok), Tobacco, or other harmful substances. Some members choose to interpret this as a ban on caffeine, but it's not necessarily so.

While we're on this topic, let me just make a note about entertaining Mormons: most are used to navigating the intricacies of religious dietary bans and won't be offended or embarrassed if you offer something that they turn down. It's our job to understand our religion, not yours.

On Temples

"What about the fact that you and I right now could walk across 5th Avenue into St. Patricks Cathedral, no one would care or wonder what our religious affiliation is. I can't get into the Mormon Temple. Will that ever change?" - Brian Williams

To someone outside the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I think the temples are probably one of the least understood things. Its understandable why. Aside from the brief period of time between when a new temple is completed but before it's dedicated when a temple is open to the public, temples are closed to the public, and even to some members of the Church. 

But the comparison to St. Patrick's Cathedral isn't really fair, because the temple is *not* the place where our weekly worship takes place. That happens in a local meetinghouse. These local meeting houses ARE open to the public. Drive past any one and you'll see it right on a sign out front: "Visitors Welcome." Come join us.


Racism, homosexuality, inequality towards women, etc.
Brian Williams' special, predictably, touched on some hard-hitting aspects of Mormonism. These are topics that I'm happy to talk about, but I spend enough time reading comments on blogs to be leery of discussing controversial things with anonymous on the web. If you'd like my take on any of these things, the door is open.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

365 tk II

Inspired by my sister, I've decided to take a second stab at doing a 365.

Catch up with it at: http://365.papercog.com

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Stranger than fiction?

Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction.

This is a story about these three objects:



(Don't mind that the scale is all off between these three objects!)

Nearly 2 years ago (21 months ago) I moved from Salt Lake back to Provo to continue school. Shortly after the move...two things turned up missing. Mainly my compact digital camera and my handheld GPS. I had a nicer camera at the time, so the loss of the camera was more annoying than true hindrance...but the GPS was a different story. It went missing right as I was leaving for a road trip to Seattle, and it's missing would eventually lead me to overpay for a TomTom GPS, which I hated, only to sell it on eBay and get a Garmin touch-screen car-type GPS.

Well about a month ago I moved again,  and suddenly things started showing up again! Sort of.

The camera showed up with some stuff that I had stored in my aunt's basement. I'd looked for it before, but I guess I just missed it. Multiple times. Actually I think it was in a box inside a box, so no wonder I couldn't find it.

Where do the sunglasses come into the story? I went to wear my sunglasses (Just like those pictured...except larger) and I could not find them! And I was mad! Because I love those sun glasses. I searched through my house, I drove up to campus and looked through my office. I asked my sister if I was wearing glasses or contacts the last time I saw her (I was trying to retrace my steps...for the past week). I could not find those glasses anywhere but...

...in the process of looking for the glasses, I found the GPS! And where had it been for 21 months? Face down under the passenger seat of my car. I kid you  not. The GPS is kind of a dark camo gray, and my carpet is beige+18 years (So gray), and I've had a covered underground parking stall for the past 21 months, and I guess I just never looked under that seat with a bright enough flashlight or something. There the whole time! That's just funny to me. That means it was sitting there taunting me during all those roadtrips I took with my new GPS.

Now, this GPS has an altimeter function; and you can set it to turn on every 15 minutes and record barometric pressure...an option that I usually had on. So I imagined that whenever I did finally manage to find this GPS, the batteries would be dead dead dead, leaked all over the place, ruining the poor GPS.

Wrong again! I hit the power button and it fired right up. It knew what time it was to the minute (I think the clock drifted a few seconds over the 2 year period), and within 3-4 minutes I had a sattelite lock, accurate to within 50 feet. I was impressed! So I checked the options and FORTUNATELY I had disabled the option for it to take an altimeter reading every 15 minutes. So I checked the altimeter log for the most recent reading....August 28 (2008). So yeah, the GPS was lost under that seat from August 28, 2008 to May 31, 2011.

The batteries in it were Sanyo Eneloops, and even though they seemed to be working fine I was dying to know how much charge they'd lost over 2 years. So I stuck them on my ├╝ber-geeky battery charger that will analyze batteries, and it looks like they both took about 500 mah. They're ~2100 mah batteries, so they lost roughly 25% of their charge by sitting for 2 years in a car that saw all extremes of temperature that a car sees...everything from sweltering heat to blistering cold. That's pretty impressive I think!!

But what about the sun glasses? Well I searched and searched and searched some more and found them too! Where? You'll never guess...under the passenger seat? No. Under the driver's.

If you're missing something, go check really really really good under the seats of your car. There's no telling what you'll find down there!! And if you want to come look under the seats of my car? You're welcome, but I don't think you'll find anything...it's now the first place I look whenever I lose something ;-)

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Car review madlibs

I read a lot of car reviews...and while once in awhile you read something unique, it seems like they all sound mostly the same. It's something like this:

The Edsel is a fine looking car. It kind of looks like the other cars in it's class, but it has some unique aspects to it too. Our Edsel came in cherry metallic red with optional 19" tires and wheels.

Inside the Edsel is pretty nice, the designers did a good job for the most part, but unfortunately they skimped in some other areas. The walls of the glove box are hard plastic instead of mink fur.

The car drove great for the most part at everyday speeds. It was able to accelerate up to freeway speeds and stop short of cross-traffic. We were able to turn at stoplights and intersections without the car rolling over, and the reverse gear was handy too -- for getting out of parking stalls. The push-button activated transmission is a little slow, but it's refreshing to see an automaker trying something new.

Unfortunately when pushed at high speeds the Edsel starts to show it's shortcomings. As such, it's not our first choice. We'd much prefer a LeMans car.

One thing that Edsel is going to have a problem with is pricing. Our fully loaded press-tester model with every single available option, including live-in butler, was $9,000. To put that into perspective, a scooter is only $3,000 and a scooter also moves you between locations under it's own power. We like the Edsel, but we'd probably buy {Insert even more expensive car} instead.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

PayPal are crooks

I've heard PayPal horror stories. Now I have one of my own.

Briefly: I have two bank accounts. I have one with a local banking institution that I'm pretty jaded with. The other is with INGDirect.com. I'm not thrilled with them either, frankly, but for the most part they do a better job than the local banking institution. The one thing they don't do is take deposits. I have to make the deposits through my local institution and then make an ACH transfer. My paycheck direct deposits to ING Direct. It's my main financial account. I receive utility and other random payments to the local banking account, and this usually ends up being just enough to write my tithing check.

So in short, the local bank account is usually running more or less on empty.

I plan to open an account with BankSimple as soon as they'll allow me.

Last week I got an email from PayPal that I had send a large quantity of money to some website I'd never heard of. I figured it was a fraudulent email designed to steal my password. Just the same, I went ahead and visited PayPal.com (NOT through the email) and sure enough...after forcing me to change my password and enter new security  $### had been withdrawn from my account. Even though the transaction had happened less than 5 minutes prior (I keep a close watch on my email), PayPal had already flagged the transaction as fraud. I went through some steps with them to verify my account ownership and figured the issue would resolve itself. I wasn't too worried about it, frankly. The only thing I was worried about was my password. Like an idiot I was using the same password on some other websites, so I promptly went to all of them and generated secure random passwords for those sites. Fortunately I've been using 1Password from Agile for over a year, so creating and storing new passwords wasn't too difficult...just time consuming.

I was hoping that because PayPal caught the transaction so quickly it would never hit my bank account, but I knew the combined amount of the fraudulent transaction and my tithing check would exceed even my overdraft amount on my checking account. Just to be safe I held off on paying my tithing.

Ok. Fast forward to tonight. I login to my banking account and notice that...sure enough...I'm in overdraft. I check PayPal. The fraudulent transaction resolved in my favor, no surprises there...but where's the $###? It's not in my PayPal account and it's not in my bank account. PayPal lists it on temporary hold. I *THINK* that it's on it's way back to my bank account...but I'm not sure.

So even though PayPal suspected within seconds that the transaction was fraud, they went ahead and pulled $### from my bank account!!!


People fault credit cards a lot (and certainly credit cards are not without their fault); but credit cards tend to offer a lot more consumer protection. If this were a credit card transaction, I could immediately have the transaction reversed. The charge would be suspended from my account and I wouldn't be expected to pay interest on it until the issue was resolved. If the charge turned out to be fraud I wouldn't have to pay interest on it at all. Most all credit cards have a $0 liability, meaning that if your credit card gets stolen...as long as you take appropriate actions you are liable for $0 of the fraud. But since it's a bank account I'm screwed. The money is just stuck in limbo for days while PayPal and my bank make money on my money while pretending that it takes 3-5 business days to transfer money digitally.

(Most bank accounts, by the way, have only the minimum federal fraud protection. That means that if your account info gets stolen YOU may be liable for the first $50 worth of the fraud -- and if they somehow get your ATM PIN and take your money out that way, you won't get ANY of it back).

But the plot gets even better.

Since PayPal knew the charge was fraud...the crooks never got the money either. The only people who got my money were PayPal. I have no clue what the numbers are on fraudulent transactions are, but PayPal has hundreds of millions of users and I would venture to guess that at any given time they are sitting on hundreds of thousands, if not millions of dollars worth of stolen money.

I want my money back.

PayPal are crooks.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Swiss Cheese and the Provo Tabernacle

It's confession time -- I like to learn about how systems break down; and one industry that does a fantastic job of investigating the breakdown of complex systems is the airline industry. When a plane goes down, or even if it just overruns the runway, a thorough investigation is always launched to find the exact causes.

One theory that is used in the airline industry is called the "Swiss Cheese Theory." A stolen graphic is in order:



(Originally stolen from HERE).

So the idea behind this swiss cheese model is that major incidents and acciedents don't usually happen "by themselves," but rather they represent the breakdown of a system on many levels. The "eyes" or bubbles in swiss cheese represent the mistakes. Line enough of these bubbles up and you have a hole in your cheese. Line enough small incidents up and you can end up with a big one.


With this in mind, I wasn't really surprised when I learned today that an alarm had been ignored at the Provo Tabernacle prior to it's burning down about a month ago. It wasn't what I expected to read, but I wasn't surprised.

Over on the Provo Herald Website I found a little treat. 4 audio files that provide some real insight into the tragedy at the Provo Tabernacle. Let me take you through them, and then break them down a bit.

Audio 1:
This is a conversation between the security officer (An off-duty police officer) and dispatch. He calls to see if they're getting reports from the building. He and the dispatcher discuss who they should contact.

Officer: "My cell phone has died...is there any way you can contact a responsible party for the Tabernacle? There's an alarm is going off. I do have a name for the person I'm working for...I don't know that he's going to know anything about the alarm system, though."

Officer: "Just let them know on the alarm panel it shows 'attic space' "

Audio 2:

This file starts to put things into perspective in combination with the first file. This file is the dispatcher trying to call people for the security officer (Since his phone was dead). The number the city had on hand as the building's "responsible party" goes to a disconnect message. The officer relays a phone number that must have been on a sign next to the alarm panel. As best as I can piece together, this number went to the voicemail of a person with the Provo FM group...this is the person you would contact if the panel was malfunctioning, not a 24 hr type of number. The dispatcher eventually gets ahold of Tyler Weston, a producer with BYU TV. Tyler sounds tired...as I'm sure he was; the call came in at something like 1:30 AM. As predicted, Tyler doesn't know anything about the alarm panel, but he does know who to call to find out.

Tyler: "Let me call the building coordinators."

The only goal at this point is to get the alarm panel shut off. The dispatcher gives Tyler her phone number and disconnects. Tyler calls back. He gets a different dispatcher. He's explaining the situation:

Tyler: "We have an off-duty Provo police officer down there guarding some production equipment and he said the alarm had gone off"
Dispatch: "Oh so he was the one that set the alarm off off?"
Tyler: "Uhhh I don't know if he did, but I just spoke to the building coordinators who said that that alarm had gone off before and that it's a false alarm. If he's able to find the panel inside the back door that resets the alarm he can go ahead and do that. If he has any questions he has my mobile number direct, he can give me a phone call."
Dispatch: "We'll let him know, you have a nice night."


Audio 3: Dispatch to the security officer
Dispatch: "Tyler called back and said it's a Code 4 to reset if you find the panel."
(Code 4 meaning "no further assistance needed)
Officer: "Ok I'll see if I can reset it."
Officer: "I reset it, but it's going off every 10-15 seconds as soon as I let go."
Dispatch: "Did you want us to get Tyler on the phone and transfer him over to you?"
Officer: "Well...my cell phone is dead so I can't. Did the property manager call you or just Tyler?"
Dispatch: "Tyler is the only one that called."
Officer: "Let me see if I can figure it out."
Dispatch: "We can call him back if you'd like us to."
Officer: "I could just stand here for 5 hours and" (Radio breaks up)
Dispatch: "I think that would be a good idea."

(There was probably a passing of time here but it's cut out of the audio file)

Officer: "I broke the male trend and read the instruction manual. Got it figured out!"
Dispatch: "You do have it figured out?"
Officer: "I do. Thanks for your help."
Dispatch: "Good Job!"
Officer: "I know, I feel pretty special too."
Dispatch: "I'm definitely proud."


Audio 4 -- About an hour later...

Officer: "Got a fire at the Tabernacle."
Dispatch: "Confirm...you HAVE a fire at the Tabernacle?"
Officer: "Correct, got one right now."

(The rest is, sadly, history).


Now...people are going to blame the guard, and certainly he played a role in this...but swiss cheese.

1 - Nobody was planning for a fire.

The news articles state that the security guard was hired to protect the production equipment and "check the heat in the building every three hours." If you know anything about how all LDS churches are wired up, that means he was supposed to go push the button inside the building every 3 hours to keep the heat on full blast. Probably to help protect the expensive instruments from wild temperature swings that could throw them out of tune. He was doing surveillance at the building, but even with a dead cell phone he could have called for help on his police radio.

2 - What does this panel do?

You would think that a police officer would be able to tell the difference between a security panel and a fire alarm panel, but for some reason he couldn't. It's obvious from the way the officer talks that he thinks the panel was indicating an intruder, not a fire, in the attic of the tabernacle. "Are you getting a report of an alarm over at the Tabernacle?" When the officer called in he had already searched the building -- at least the ground floor. News reports state that he "didn't search the attic because he wouldn't have known how to get access to that part of the building". That's fine, but I'm willing to wager that if he was more clear on the fact that it was a fire alarm, he would have been a little more diligent at trying to check the attic. From the get-go the officer's goal was not to investigate the fault, but rather, to shut the alarm off. When dispatch finally gets ahold of Tyler, they say "He said that the panel indicates that it's in the attic. He doesn't know if you would be able to help turn that off, or if you know who might be able to."


3 - Every played telephone?

Tyler finally gets ahold of the building co-ordinators. This phone conversation was not recorded, so we may never know what exactly was said...but if you were in charge of a building and somebody woke you at 1 AM to tell you that the security guard had called and the alarm was going off...would your first response be to question the security officer? "Oh, and he checked the attic for a fire?" or would you just go with the flow? "That alarm has gone off before. If he finds the control panel he can just shut it off himself." Can you see how this system is breaking down? Of all the parties we've encountered so far, the building coordinators should have been the ones to suspiciously put their foot down and say "Oh...here's how to check for a fire in the attic." -- but instead of being contacted by the security officer directly, they were contacted by Tyler. Who was contacted by dispatch. It was too many links deep in the chain. So operating on a tiny bit of information they made the same assumptions that most of us probably would have -- the building had already been checked out and it was safe, the alarm is just malfunctioning. Remember, nobody was planning for a fire.

4 - Unprofessional conduct

I said before that this isn't solely the fault of the guard on scene...and I maintain that...but I was kind of surprised at his casualness of the situation once he finally tried to shut the alarm off. At the same time, I can't really fault him. Those alarms can be loud, and at this point he had probably been listening to it on and off for 10-15 minutes or more. Still...they're loud for a reason.

5 - "I broke the male trend and read the instructions"

This is where, for me, things get really interesting. At the end of the day the alarm itself broke down too. There was a reason the alarm kept going off after he silenced it -- there was obviously a fire in the attic tripping the alarm. Eventually he shut the whole thing up, but how is not clear, and this to me poses more questions than answers. Questions like:

How did he shut it up? Did he override the alarm and tell the system to ignore it?
If the system was ignoring the alarm...was it ignoring 1 sensor, or a whole zone?
If it was ignoring a whole zone, was the attic only 1 zone?
Did the fire spread to other zones before it was noticed by the Nu Skin security guard?
(That's right -- in the end it was a Nu Skin security guard, not the guard at the Tabernacle, who noticed smoke...about an hour later)
If the fire spread to other zones, did the alarm go off again -- or had the officer overridden all alarms?
If he had to shut the alarm off again, did he check the panel again to see if it's error had changed, or did he just haphazardly assume that it was malfunctioning again?
Did the instructions on how to shut the alarm off include any warnings to double check that the system was malfunctioning before overriding things?
Did the officer even read these warnings?


Swiss Cheese...here we thought the Provo Fire department would just come back and say something like the lighting equipment put in place by the film crew short-circuited (Not likely, since it's run off generators and not the building's power. Generators that were not even running at the time of the fire) -- but as in most situations like this, the real answers are much more complex than any of us could have imagined.

Saturday, January 8, 2011

What happens in Vegas?

I couple of really strange things happened in the last 12 hours. I'ma make a bunch of nano-blog posts here and share them.

1 - We were waiting in the Las Vegas airport and made a new friend. Taylor and I were at the gate waiting to board our (delayed) flight and Thayne was off charging his phone. When he came back we asked him where he want. He replied that he had been at the recharge zone and this is when our new friend mumbled (to us? to himself?) "it takes forever to charge at the recharge zone." Oh-kay buddy. I told my friend Taylor that I would put money on him being an Android user; not because all Android users are crazy -- that's not the stereotype -- but because he just seemed like the kind of guy that's sure that Steve Jobs is out for his soul. So a few minutes later Taylor decides to go find a drinking fountain. As he's walking away crazy guy mutters -- just loud enough to be barely audible to us --  "It's a marketing decision to remove the drinking fountain. They want to force you to buy a bottle of water."

So while he's gone some executives in suits for a software company start talking to Thayne about what tablets were at CES. They were asking about what was good, what was crappy, etc. and crazy guy injects himself back into the conversation, at normal conversational volume this time: "If you take a screw driver and bash it down on the screen of an iPad, I guarntee it would break. I know from experience. But if you take one to the screen of a Droid X, it won't break. It won't even get scratched. Because of the Gorilla glass. I tried to screw up my Droid X so Best Buy would give me a new one. Because I have insurance. But it wouldn't break. I ran over it with a truck and the screen still wouldn't break, but the camera broke." Thayne's response was priceless: "I just don't have much every-day contact with screw drivers."

Mercifully, we started boarding.

2 - I got completely lost in Holladay and ended up in Cottonwood Heights.

3 - Something about the flight (I'm guessing...the number of hours I'd been awake probably didn't help) screwed up something in my inner ear and driving on the freeway was a surreal experience.

4 - I stopped at Wal-Mart to get a white elephant gift (Because where else are you going to get one at 1:30 in the morning) and a guy was pushing a new HDTV out to his car in a shopping cart. Who buys a new TV at 1:30 in the morning? He does I guess.

5 - I then proceeded to find the strangest DVD I could find in the $5 bin, which turned out to be a $2.50 bin. I'm sure the guy that rung me in electronics wondered what kind of person I was buying one strange DVD in the middle of the night.